I am reflecting on what it is like to watch a dearly loved parent slowly die.It really puts things into perspective. It is interesting when it only catches the conversation of friends for a few moments. Sad to say, we are not a society that understands the passing of life very well. A good lesson for me.
I am trying to keep things together here. Conferences I should attend, meetings I should go to. It is hard to tell people, I just don’t want to do any of these things, I am waiting on my father.
No one seems to get this.
I am the first to admit I haven’t been as good, nearly as good as I should have been in the past when friends of mine have gone through the loss of a loved one. Maybe now I will be better. Maybe now I will understand things better.
Life goes on through social media and more pictures of hikes, climbs, and runs. I just want to take a minute to stop and honour someone who I have loved so dearly.
Dad, we love you.
7 thoughts on “The Dying of the Day”
Paul. I understand.
Hold his hand. Tell him you love him and that you know he loves you.
Stroke his head.
Tell him stories. Make him laugh.
Be. Be with him in his world.
Paul, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Please, give yourself a break and look after you. You need time to process your grief and feelings. You need to take care of yourself for a bit now, take the time, please, for your own health. Everyone will understand. Sending my love and respect for you, Paul.
So sorry to hear this news, Paul. It is extremely difficult to watch a parent slowly pass. My mother has dementia and I can tell you that the past few years have been extremely difficult, and the journey to death continues. I do agree it is life changing, to go through this process. I have really struggled, and hit some real low points. Stay strong, stay true to yourself, nurture your soul. Conferences and meetings will always be there. Take the moments you have and cherish them. Sending lots of thoughts your way.
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Paul, my heart goes out to you! I didn’t watch this happen, but I did experience my dad’s sudden death at the end of September. It helped me put a lot in perspective. Sending you my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.
Paul, sending hugs. I lost my dad 13 years ago this fall, way too soon, to the hell that is ALS. Your sentence about waiting on your father did me in. Take some time, do all the things the always-wise Peter Skillen says to do. Bring love. I sat beside my dead and read “Inkheart” out loud to him, because it was what I was reading at the time, and I thought he’d like it. At the very least, it eased my experience of his passing,
This is such hard stuff. The other thing that I did, because I was two weeks into a job at a new school, was to tell everybody (colleagues and students) what was going on. There was no opportunity to obfuscate, because I needed their support. People who haven’t been through it will have trouble – people who have will help. Trust them to carry you.
Thanks Lisa. Really good advice. It is an on-going struggle.